Noh, Kyogen and Tea Ceremonies! My recent-ish experiences of Japanese culture.

A few weeks ago now, my friends and I managed to get free tickets to go and see a Noh and Kyogen performance (specially for gaijin) from our University. We were totally stoked about it. We went to a pretty little theatre in Kyoto, but unfortunately I don't have any photos, because we weren't allowed to take any.

Kyogen
The performance started off with Kyogen, which is a traditional Japanese comedy play. When we were seated, we were given English translations of the script, which was nice, so I read the play through once before it started in the hope of understanding what was going on. The play was about a man who was going to see his father-in-law, and convinced his dad to come with him, but they only brought one hakuma (smart, traditional Japanese clothing), with them, so only met with the father-in-law individually and kept swapping the hakuma between them, to make it look like they both had one to wear. In the end, the father-in-law demanded to see them both at once, and they ended up splitting the hakuma in half, and wearing it on the front side, but being very careful in order to not show their bums. In the end, they are found out, and they run off stage all embarrassed. It was quite amusing, and I could understand most of what was going on, probably thanks to the fact that I read the script through once, but it was also a pretty simple story and it wasn't too hard to catch what was going on. I really enjoyed Kyogen and would definitely recommend it, even if you have little or no knowledge of Japanese.

Noh
Next up was Noh. Noh is a lot slower, and is normally a tragic story. The way that the actors speak is slow and difficult to understand, and the story is not quite so easy to get from the way people move and act. The Noh play was about two or three (I can't remember) men who ended up outside for some reason or another, and ask a woman to take shelter in her house. The woman doesn't usually have guests, but lets the strangers in to stay. Later, she sets out to get firewood and tells the men not to look in a particular room. They agree, and the one in charge tells the others that they have given their word and under no circumstances must they look in the room, but one man's curiosity gets the best of him, and when the other men are sleeping, he looks in the room and finds bodies piled high. He warns his superiors, who look and decide they must leave, but the woman returns. She is actually some kind of demon and is really angry that they looked in the room, and fights the men, who manage to banish her with some prayer beads. This all happens incredibly slowly until the demon turns up, where it speeds up a bit. Of course, I've told what I remember of the story, so I'm sorry if it is not exactly correct! Because of Noh's slow speed, and my weak understanding of Japanese, let alone crazy old slow Japanese, I found myself almost falling asleep during Noh (I was also suffering from a lack of sleep, though). Even though Noh was interesting, I wouldn't really recommend it for anyone who wasn't seriously into Japanese traditional culture, or is feeling a little tired. I also wouldn't recommend it for anyone who doesn't have a good level of Japanese proficiency, unless their show also comes with an English script. I would say that a more efficient way to spend your time would be at one of the other shows.

Sado - Tea Ceremony
So the Tea Ceremony was part of a Japanese Culture class that I take at University, and as silly as it may sound to those who are desperate to experience Japanese culture, I didn't really want to go. It was compulsory, but hosted on a Saturday morning, having to meet at the Chikatetsu (subway/underground) at 9am (urgh). This aside, we were obviously also drinking green tea, which I don't like at all and eating the traditional Japanese Okashi (sweets), which I'm normally also not so keen on. I'm not a big fan of the matcha (green tea) flavour, which is a shame because in Kyoto, you can get nearly everything in matcha flavour - not just your tea, but also chocolate, ice cream, kit kats, shaved ice - you name it, they probably have a matcha version somewhere. I really wish I liked the taste, but I don't, which makes tea ceremonies a pain in the arse too, because it's typically expected that you drink all of the tea you are given when you attend a tea ceremony.

We went to the tea ceremony sensei's house, which was beautiful and traditional, full of tatami and shoji and everything you imagine a traditional Japanese house to look like. We all had to wear white socks. That's a thing in tea ceremonies, apparently, and I had to go and buy white socks especially, but I got a pair from the 100yen shop (which is about 60p), so that wasn't all too bad. We also didn't wear kimono or anything, which really disappointed me. I wish our university had organised for us to wear kimono. When we entered the room, the whole class of us was about 16 or 17 students, I think, and we were split in half when served tea. We all had to sit in the seiza position (kneeling, which is actually really uncomfortable for long periods of time), but luckily this was a very laid back tea ceremony, so we were allowed to rest our legs often. I was served tea and okashi in the second half. The okashi was actually quite tasty, as opposed to the strange, not so nice okashi I have eaten before. It was in the shape of a leaf, and was bright red, as we were in the midst of the momiji (red autumn leaves) season. I really liked how our tea ceremony was themed around momiji. As one of my teachers was helping with the tea ceremony, she kindly made my tea weaker than everybody else's, as she knew that I didn't like it so much. I still didn't like it, but I managed to finish all of it. There were a few different things we had to say in Japanese such as excusing ourselves to drink before the person next to us, who had yet to be served tea, and we had also had to bow at different points in the ceremony. Afterwards, we learnt that tea ceremonies used to be for men such as samurai to relax and forget about the outside world and the people that they had killed, and other such stressed. Watches aren't allowed in the room because you are supposed to forget about time. I probably should have written about this a lot sooner, as I've forgotten some of the finer details of what happened. In the end, I am happy to have experienced it, but I wish that I could have worn kimono!

So there's three recent cultural experiences of mine here in Japan. I would definitely recommend them to those interested in Japanese culture - especially Kyogen.

また今度; Japanese 'Politeness', and why it's the bane of my life.

I often describe things as the bane of my life, but only when they really annoy me. Things that have annoyed me to the point where I can call it the bane of my life include French, Stairs, and now Japanese social etiquette when it comes to invitations.

If you are Japanese and you have a lot of gaijin friends and you are reading this, take note, because nearly every gaijin friend I have has expressed their frustration with the way Japanese people reject social invitations.

Before coming to Japan, I had heard several rumours about how Japanese people made refusals. People said Japanese people never say 'No', they just say 'Yes', and then don't actually turn up. Whilst that is not actually true, the first part remains fast. In my experience, inviting people tends to follow a few trends.

The first one is simple; they accept, and everything is wonderful and you have a great time. This doesn't happen as often as one would like. But, the problem does not end here. At the end of your your day out, no matter how great, or how absolutely horrific it was, your Japanese friend will always put on a smile and tell you they had a wonderful time, and that you should hang out again soon. They will probably tell you this even if they discovered that they can't stand you. One of my friends told me that when they first arrived in Japan, they met up with somebody who had been to their university (or something like that), but since they had just arrived, they weren't that comfortable using Japanese, and barely said a word during the entire meal. He told me it was terrible, but even so, their Japanese friend sent them a LINE message afterwards telling them how much fun they had and that they should do it again, which my friend firmly insists is definitely a lie. I definitely have trust issues with Japanese people now, and I never know when they are being serious about whether they want to hang out again, or whether they had an awful time. One time, whilst relatively intoxicated, I had to reaffirm with my friend if he really wanted to hang out again, or if he was just doing the polite Japanese thing. He reaffirmed that, yes, he earnestly wanted to hang out again, but of course that hasn't really happened.

Next up, they will step around your question with, 'maybe', or 'I'll try to come'. Don't be fooled. 9 times out of 10, they've already decided they aren't coming, they just don't want to say no. You'll hang around, asking every so often if they can, which they may or may not reply to you, and in the end, they might tell you that they can't before not turning up, or they may just not turn up.

Then, you get the closest thing to a 'No', that happens in Japan. They apologise, and say they really want to come, BUT they have exams/ have no money/are too busy/have (unspecified) plans. Then, they will say また今度 (mata kondo - next time!), and sometimes even ask you to invite them along next time. Now sometimes this does mean that the excuse you have given them is completely true, and that they really want to come. However, more often than it would be nice, it actually means that they either don't want to do the activity you've invited them to, or they don't want to hang out with you at all. For example, if you invite somebody to go to Karaoke, they tell you "Oh, I'm sorry - I have no money. Please invite me next time! Have fun!", when actually, they just don't like karaoke. No doubt, the next time you go, you invite them because you asked, and lo and behold there is another convenient reason that they can't come. It makes me want to shout 'BAG OF LIES LIES LIES' at everybody who tells me また今度.

 On one occasion, I've been told "maybe next time", and I've named the dates of the next two planned events, to which the reply came that even two months away they were too busy, and "maybe next year". The worst is when you've already found out that they aren't busy, or they go out with different people to do something else, and you wonder why they couldn't just be straight with you and say 'actually, I don't really fancy it today', or 'actually, I don't really like karaoke/going drinking/insert activity here'.

Of course, the reason behind this is that it's polite. Nobody wants to just say 'No', but to me it's really frustrating. I don't want to ask somebody time and time again (because they keep asking me to!), for the answer to be no. I've already given up on a few friends who I'm tired of asking. I've learnt to never trust what people say about wanting to hang out, or having had a good time, and it's quite tiresome and hard-going. Maybe one day I will get the hang of it, but for now I'll just carry on smiling, and pretending I don't want to punch everybody who tells me "また今度" in the face.